Of Jane
it's your book.
Jane is my favorite female name. I don’t object to others, but there is just something about Jane. And there was just something about Jane. There was something else about us that left her wanting. She loves to get pounded, long, hot and sweaty. I know that it’s difficult to get a certain exactly that. I bless her fucking however she wants to fuck.
We did. I knew and acknowledged what she wanted the most. She still had me. Her skinny thighs would become fully blossomed hips as I swam in her. Mm hmm I got to look into her tawny eyes and spill my joy into her, in face to face eye contact. I wanted her to see my face surrendering to her, and I showed her many times. Jane was one of my last deep lovers. She knew what bookofblue was becoming and her pairing with a different man was a deep, sweet point of departure from me fucking.
She and her lover knew and accepted, and through Jane encouraged, my mirror masturbation to their sex. They knew their sex set me free to explore who I needed to become.
This was most profoundly consummated in a phone call I took in a hotel room where she described that day’s sex with him, for our mutual pleasure. I have a photograph of my dildo and many stranded covered mirror…I fucked myself to her describing being fucked. We were dolphins and we were both masturbating to her beauty.
This was also the total surrender of guilt…
There’s no better way to not feel guilty for connecting with someone else than if your ex boyfriend is sent wildly into orgasm by your new fuck. By your new lover and that you love him. That fact of your mutual welcome. He knows I’m cumming on a mirror and eating myself to all of their delight. He understands her…
Our relationship began this way, too. On maybe our third date — I would travel to her city — I met another man who was interested in her. That is, she introduced us. In our conversation I said I would be open to being present while they fucked. She knew I would want this and they had probably talked about it privately.
And in a little while it was happening. She set up her futon in the living room — which she did when she had a lover staying over — and they got naked and went for one another. In a hot and hungry way. Me, nascently in love with her as this happens…and I want to know her this way…I want to be initiated into her sexual freedom for real at the outset.
My utter beauty of this encounter was feeling the base of his penis throb as he ejaculated into her. When they both seemed to want his release, I asked if I could, if I may. He said yes. I loved that Jane would know how I indulged such a desire. He came sweetly as his urethra throbbed against my fingers as I heard her wimper and cry out as he did.
And then I was so timid about masutbating in front of them that it was awkward. Obviously hat was the thing to do. But then somehow not. I knew I needed to do it to be complete, and I coaxed myself into it, got naked and spread out my knees and with a just do it feeling masturbated into my palm and licked myself up as they pretended not to notice.
The reason I started writing this essay was to say that I loved to lick Jane’s asshole.
I could offer her my adoration and submission granting her this deeply relaxing pleasure. I may have been the one who taught her how good it feels to get your asshole licked out deeply. I could tell by her astonishing sense of discovering this was even possible. There is that always your first to taste you and give it to you.
Whenever things got sexual, she could squeeze my tongue with her asshole all she wanted. I loved loved loved for her to masturbate while I tongued her core. Jane was a well-known, strikingly gorgeous cabaret performer, and I would describe her as slightly stuck-up. When I swirled my tongue around the deep creamy center of her bitchness, of her humanity, I felt only respect
as she clasped my hand and let me love on her.
One day this happened in a forest. Jane was not the type to do something like smoke pot. Her New England purity was adorable. However, on one occasion, she ate a gummy before we went on a hike. Or rather a little too much of one and was kind of tripping. The last thing I remember, she was naked, bent over, clasping the shaft of a tree, as I knelt before her, behind her, and slipped into her fanny and tongue fucked her to our mutual delight.
Jane, whom I asked to help guide me toward my mirror. And she did, she did…held it for me as fae held it for her. She said, it’s your book.